Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
I use my feet as sexual weapons
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