i permit you to call me
shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
my penis made a compromise with my morals
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
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