It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
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