Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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