Your mouth is God's brothel.
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Randomize
