Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
Hey, don't blame me for the shitty evening; I wasn't the one who promised hookers, Dos Equis and foster kittens. Keith was.
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
Randomize
