Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(718): View more from New York

so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood

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(718): so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood http://tfl.nu/a9i9

Replies (11) Good night (621) Bad night (1546)
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(503): View more from Oregon

I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.

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(503): I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz. http://tfl.nu/wgvl

Replies (84) Good night (2097) Bad night (6190)
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(203): View more from Connecticut

'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.

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(203): 'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence. http://tfl.nu/k9vf

Replies (15) Good night (705) Bad night (3612)
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(763): View more from Minnesota

I unwillingly was the ball between four hungry hippos last night. I thought the one chick was actually going to eat me

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(763): I unwillingly was the ball between four hungry hippos last night. I thought the one chick was actually going to eat me http://tfl.nu/kago

Replies (28) Good night (903) Bad night (4341)
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(925): View more from California

im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?

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(925): im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going? http://tfl.nu/wvih

Replies (65) Good night (5035) Bad night (1518)
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(408): View more from California

there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing

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(408): there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing http://tfl.nu/z6st

Replies (12) Good night (3030) Bad night (1009)
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(732): View more from New Jersey

His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him

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(732): His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him http://tfl.nu/bx2z

Replies (8) Good night (870) Bad night (3921)
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(914): View more from New York

im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl

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(914): im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl http://tfl.nu/i1d7

Replies (15) Good night (911) Bad night (5025)
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(504): View more from Louisiana

Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.

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(504): Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine. http://tfl.nu/uqy7

Replies (13) Good night (2124) Bad night (2628)
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(315): View more from New York

someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this

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(315): someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this http://tfl.nu/qf5d

Replies (2) Good night (2717) Bad night (976)
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(902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...

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(902): we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids... http://tfl.nu/udrg

Replies (2) Good night (1885) Bad night (1073)
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(512): View more from Texas

Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...

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(512): Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation... http://tfl.nu/vkji

Replies (3) Good night (2416) Bad night (1452)
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(325): View more from Texas

The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.

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(325): The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her. http://tfl.nu/fi1h

Replies (33) Good night (1700) Bad night (4125)
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(906): View more from Michigan

I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner

(503): View more from Oregon

Soooo, coming over soon?

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(906): I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner (503): Soooo, coming over soon? http://tfl.nu/cs7r

Replies (22) Good night (3415) Bad night (590)
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(519): View more from Ontario

you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"

(1-519): View more from Ontario

no way

(519): View more from Ontario

that's when i decided you were gonna be okay

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(519): you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese" (1-519): no way (519): that's when i decided you were gonna be okay http://tfl.nu/clro

Replies (1) Good night (1493) Bad night (443)

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