he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
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my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
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Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
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