Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.
I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.
Dude, you are the most awesome.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
