Say something about gay babies.
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
I'm going to invent an ap that tests your stress levels before texting and will say something like "nope, go rub one out and try again in 10 min"
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
Randomize