I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
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