What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Randomize
