What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize