i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
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