hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
