So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
where does the pee come out of this thing
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
ok first of all what the fuck
Randomize
