Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
