Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
