we have officially lost it.
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
I'm going to CVS to meet the Craigslist guy who is going to buy my underwear. If I don't text you within the next hour, plz assume that I have been abducted by a stranger with an underwear fetish.
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
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