Are you dead
Yes
Oh man
Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
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