No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
Randomize