those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
