Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
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