Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
Randomize
