3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
The number of injuries I get impersonating Shakira while drunk is getting ridiculous. Sprained vagina, dude.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
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