Do you have any cake mix? I kind of need to make a "im sorry i drank all your parents tequila, threw up all over your floor and slept with you boyfriend" cake.
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip πππ
Your skills amaze me
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
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