YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
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