she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
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