You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
Randomize
