found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
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It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
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