its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
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