At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
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