we made out on top of his cat.
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
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