I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
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