so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
my poor anus
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
Randomize
