never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
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