Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Randomize
