The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
But we have bathrooms and they dont
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