Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
Randomize
