We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
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