no, he came in my armpit
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
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