How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
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