my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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