I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Randomize
