in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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