Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
Randomize
