You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
I want to make a zoo with you.
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
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Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
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I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
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