no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
Taco trucks are like ice cream trucks for drunk adults. They should have a mariachi tune they play super loud to bring people out of the bars for tacos.
We're going as conductors of the hot mess train and nobody rides for free
Our tip jar will say "just put the tip in, see how it feels"
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
Fuck me I smell like cheese
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
Randomize
