This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
Disregard any previous text from the past 12 hours. Except for the one about scoring a strike while drunk bowling. Remember that one.
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
Randomize