he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
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