We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
Randomize