the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Dude I got in an Uber this morning and he goes “I drove you last night”\n“You got your dick sucked in the back seat”
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize
