I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Randomize
